i am mollie's appendix

(haha- i just watched Fight Club again...)i hate this part- how to hide the aftermath of a burst of SI. i should know- i've been doing this since i was 6- but i never think of anything that really works- i mean, i could wear bracelets or something- but i dunno. im getting really anxious over stupid shit. i feel like i could take a zillion klonopin and ambien and just crash for a couple days. i dont want to die, i just want the pain to go away, or to not be numb- i dont like living one extreme or the other- flooding or numbness. lord help me- sweet jesus. the stuff on my legs is easy to hide... but the stuff on my arm- im just a jackass for doing it like that without planning how to hide afterwards. on monday georgia is going to tell my crappy t that i want to be on rachel's waiting list because i dont have the guts to do it- i have to see her (crappy t) tomorrow at 10am. i dont want to go :( oh well. hopefully things will get better. <3,



-molliebear